And now, three Ren and Stimpy games in one post! Unbeatable value!
First up is Buckeroo$.
Stimpy has invented a console that gives you money for beating games, so the two of them start playing through stuff to get rich. That's a bit cruel I think, why do these guys get rewarded for me finishing their games for them?
Not that I'm planning to finish this crap, especially when it's playing the
Happy Happy Joy Joy song as level music on a loop.
It seems like a regular platformer so far. I've got a slap attack, but I can also switch between other ranged weapons, like melons. Hey, there's some ammo on the left! I wonder if I can jump on enemies.
Uh? What the hell just happened? Oh I guess there was a tree trunk hidden between those two enemies I jumped on, and I fell down through it. Also, I lost health. Also, I landed on an enemy down here too and lost more health.
I have no idea who this guy is. He just runs away from me.
Log.
I accidentally waste a chicken by firing it close range instead of using the slap. It's okay, I'm done with this game anyway, it's boring the hell out of me and I'm really sick of hearing 'Happy Happy Joy Joy'. Next game.
Ren and Stimpy game number two, Fire Dogs!
Hey I'm Stimpy this time. Looking at that fire truck I guess I have to find all the missing items and return them here. I can already see the boots and the hose from here.
Damn, I got caught by this guy while trying to pick up the fire extinguisher. He gave me a smack and sent me back to the start, minus a life.
Okay, I finally got the fire extinguisher (no idea how) and used it to get past that bucket of fire. Now I need to figure out how to pick up this hose. Do I have to duck or something?
I managed to get the hose (no idea how) and then got cornered by this guy again while I was trying to pick up a coat. I don't know how you're supposed to get past him. So far all I've achieved in this is picking up two things and losing all my lives.
Yeah, that sounds about right for this game. Next!
Last one. The plot in this game is we're trying to get 47 million Gritty Kitty proofs of purchase to give to Muddy Mudskipper in exchange for a time machine.
Agh, damn wasp thing, flying around knocking off all my health... bricks. But hey I got 4 Gritty Kitten tokens, and it's only the first screen! This actually isn't a platformer, which is surprising, it's more of a side scrolling beat 'em up. Though I'm only beating up flies at the moment.
There's a lot of these fences on the first stage, and each of them lies to you. If you hit the right plank, the wall comes down, if you hit the wrong one you get a plank in the face.
Yay a boss fight. I've actually just slapped one of these dogs to death already, that's where all the coins came from. Another dog just instantly sprang from the back of the van. Fortunately they're pretty easy to take down, you just corner them and smack them. It's worth taking a hit though just to hear Ren yell "YOU FILTHY SWINE!". Stimpy just stands there being useless the whole time.
And then once the dogs are dead, the two of them line up and sing the 'Happy Happy Joy Joy' song. With digitised voices. Seriously.
Next level! This time I've got falling walruses to dodge. I have to admit, the graphics in this really aren't bad at all.
I only take a couple of steps down the road before I run into the second boss battle. This time I'm against some Stimpy looking thing that keeps saying 'Happy!'.
That's it, I've reached my limit. That's all I can stand of these games. Time Warp was probably the best of them, but I don't want to see any of them or hear that damn song ever again.
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