Doom Troopers: Mutant Chronicles (Genesis/Mega Drive)

It's time for things to get real:

None of your kids crap here, this is a game for MEN! (and women!)

The faint of heart need not apply.

I present our hero, Mitch Hunter. Personally I would have gone with Gun Facenuke, Chunk Toughshit or Ray Hardgrit... but either way, with that armour and that weaponry, this guy will be unstoppable. Unless they shoot him in the arms.

We've been dropped into the jungles of Donkey Kong Country to carry out a top secret mission. So secret not even we know about it. So we fall back on what we learned in training: shoot everything, always walk to the right.

The 3d rendered character graphics can be described as 'sub mid-nineties Rare quality' or perhaps just 'sub standard', but they're functional. There's enough going on there to tell that Stud Kickface has just scored a rather effective headshot on the green gentleman on the right.

You can probably start to get a picture of how much depth the gameplay has at this point.

In this situation we recommend shooting the head.

As so.

Now we can proceed.

Or maybe not. The enemy was so stupid he didn't even realise he was missing a head, and shot me anyway.


Also yeah this IS a real game that was actually released for real.