SENSATIONAL FIVE PART SNES
SPIDER-MAN SPECIAL!
Part three:
Maximum Carnage, minimum title screen. Nice music though.
It starts by running through the whole cast list, including Captain America and Iron Fist (which I have pasted together onto one picture for your convenience).
This is Joe Asshole, a maximum security prisoner at Arkham Asylum. Okay I admit I don't know the character, all I know is that he's NOT TO BE TRUSTED.
See!
He teams up with another psycho, they swap some bad dialogue, and they then immediately run into a four armed Spider-Man lookalike purely by chance. Then they form a team! I don't know how the hell Spider-Man puts up with this bullshit all the time.
Oh.
Wow, he actually looks like Spider-Man! He's not too fat, he's not too thin, he's just right. But this doesn't seem to be a platformer like the others, this seems more like a...
Side scrolling beat 'em up! The music's not bad here either.
Spider-Man gets busy clearing the streets of tramps and teenagers. I can't even remember if they give even the slightest explanation why we're beating these people up. Did they rob a bank? Are they trying to rob me? Why are there hundreds of them?
Oh I'm sorry, did you miss me? Wait, I'll come back over there.
Oh, I tricked you again assholes!
Oh wait, you're different assholes. It's hard to tell sometimes because they're all wearing the same style clothes. Also they only seem to have 5 names to share between them. I keep coming across Billy, and Alex and etc. over and over again.
Oh crap it's a boss fight. My normal tactic of swinging around, laughing at them, then hammering the punch button doesn't seem to work as well here, due to their devastating hair attack.
I try to use some new tricks, like using my web to tie one of them up for a second so I'm free to beat up the other one.
Or just hiding behind a web shield until they quit trying to hurt me. How does a web shield work anyway? Surely it'd be like making a shield out of string?
Next level, climb the building and avoid the energy blasts coming down. The only good thing about this level is that it's really short.
Oh noes, it's the aforementioned evil four armed Spider-Man lookalike! Another boss fight straight after a boss fight? It's okay though, it's over fast. I lose.
MEANWHILE!
Plot twist, J. Jonah Jameson and Carnage are dating.
But anyway.
Spider-Man lost the fight, and is wounded. The street punks sense my weakness and come in for the kill.
Spider-Man senses an excuse to beat up more people! I mean look at these guys, I'm a super hero with super strength, they're street criminals, how is this even fair?
Clones! I hate clones.
I tricked these three into thinking we were filming a music video, then escaped.
This is the second boss, far easier than the first I reckon. I barely took a hit from him.
But I started the fight wounded, so a couple of hits was enough to finish me off. But then I get a cutscene instead of a game over?
These two appear to save me, and take me out of harm's way.
And then they drop me right into a boss battle. Where I get my ass handed to me and lose. Thanks guys.
That... was one the best side-scrolling beat 'em ups I've played out of these games so far. I was actually liking this one. A bit.
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