Dragon Ninja (ZX Spectrum)

Also known as Bad Dudes, and Bad Dudes vs Dragon Ninja. Based on the famous arcade game.

To be honest I'm only playing this because I saw the title screen and wanted an excuse to post it.

Wow, they really should have stuck to one colour for that frame.

Okay, there's a ninja on screen and it's not me, so I'm apparently fighting against the eponymous dragon ninja. And we seem to be fighting on... a railing?

Bad Dudes vs DragonNinja (Arcade)

Yeah, we're definitely balancing on top of a railing there, weird.

I just noticed the sign in the background, 'For sale. I like decogame!' Obviously put there by the ninja to distract and disorientate me. While I'm trying to figure it out, they can run over and kick me in the face.

Enemies keep jumping in, I walk right and hit them. Or sometimes they hit me. Or sometimes they all surround me and no one knows who's getting hit. It's action packed.

Can you stop screwing around and get back to fighting please? I've got 85 seconds before my Bad Dude keels over and dies for no reason, so can we perhaps hurry this up?

Here's a trick I learned from Johnny Cage.

Come on man, you're totally leaving yourself open to this. This isn't even a challenge.

He's just as much of a pushover in the arcade version too. Not that I'm complaining.

Damn this version looks so much better, you can actually see... anything.

Back to the ZX Spectrum version, and now we're fighting on the Ocean Software train I guess. Once again I utilise my 'walking right, pressing the attack button' technique to devastating effect.

Another cryptic message. I take an uppercut from a devious ninja while I'm distracted by it.

Whoa, it was a truck?

Boss #2 seems to have a weakness against low attacks too. Or maybe he's just weak against being stabbed with a knife.

See, this is why people don't all jump in and fight at the same time in martial arts movies. It just gets confusing and no one can see what's going on anymore.

Wait, are we fighting in a sewer level? What, do they have a secret ninja base down here or something or are we just taking the scenic route?

Yeah, let's keep doing martial arts next to a sewage pipe then. Okay fine, if we're going to do this here can we at least agree to no more kicks? I don't want anything on your feet to be anywhere near my face and I'm sure you ninjas feel the same way.

The boss for this level is ninja clones? Actually forget fighting, lets just... I dunno, dance for a bit. It's basically the same thing and no one gets hurt!

Actually, why the hell am I still suffering through this crap when there's an arcade version I could play instead?

That's weird, the arcade version has a totally different picture for the title screen. It's definitely better art, but it doesn't really have the same... charm to it somehow.

Now I'm curious if the other versions of the game have different title screens too.

Bad Dudes (Apple II)

They seem so happy! That's pretty much just a copy of the arcade version.

Bad Dudes (DOS)

The PC version's a pretty close copy too. Though they decided to go wild and add a jet plane.

Bad Dudes vs. Dragon Ninja (Amstrad CPC)

Okay, that's just Bruce Lee. Though I have to admit that really isn't bad for 4 colours.

Dragon Ninja (Atari ST)

Okay that's just gross. It's doesn't have anything to do with the original art, and it's... leaking.

Enough screens, I want to go kick some ninja.

It's weird to find an arcade game that deals with real life issues.

Duke Nukem hands the Bad Dudes an assignment. So are these guys secret service then, or are they just ninja fighting specialists?

Well that explains how these guys keep pouring in from all sides. Ninja delivery.

This probably won't come as a huge shock, but this plays far better than the ZX Spectrum version does. It feels much slicker and more responsive for one thing.

Ah, it's more obviously a truck instead of a train this version. Man that's either the world's tallest ninja, or the world's tiniest Porsche.

Ninja clone boss, we meet again. Only this time I can actually see my character against the group of ninja clones surrounding me, and the outcome is very different.


Okay I'm tired of this now. Next game.