Star Wars Arcade (32X)

Another 32X 3d space game! It's actually making a decent attempt at playing the theme music here.

Hmm, two choices. I'll go with the basic, less challenging version first.

Like Star Wars on the ZX Spectrum, this is based on an arcade game called Star Wars, but it's actually an entirely different arcade game based around blowing up an entirely different Death Star. Technically this should be called Return of the Jedi Arcade really.

Hey, it's Ackbar!

Hey, it's X-Wing. I mean, it looks just like the game 'X-Wing' for PC.

Star Wars: X-Wing (MS-DOS)

Okay I checked, and the two games look nothing alike really. But whatever, I'm still in an X-Wing shooting TIE Fighters, so it's all good.

I love TIE Fighters. These things explode if you sneeze on them so shooting them down isn't much of a challenge, assuming I can get the damn things on screen at all.

I can't really turn the ship up or down, only horizontally, and I can't turn fast enough to keep track of the TIEs.

So I guess the trick is to keep suddenly slowing down so they overshoot me, then shoot them up the ass with a guided proton torpedo.

The thing is, I've only got a tiny amount of time to hit them all, and the assholes never want to be in front of me.

In the other Star Wars arcade game, the TIEs at least had the decency to line up on screen to be shot.

Damn, I ran out of time on level one. And this is the easy mode?

I guess. Though isn't 'dark side' supposed to be two words? I dunno.

Okay seeing as I totally failed on easy arcade mode, I'm going to try out the more challenging 32X mode instead. I can pick an X-Wing or a Y-Wing fighter to fly in, just for a change I'll pick the X-Wing again.

Asteroids! This is new. It's shouting at me to slow down when I'm already going as slow as I can trying to make those TIEs fly past me.

My targeting computer is actually locking on to a couple right now, so I could try firing some protons off. But they recharge slowly so I have to be careful not to waste them.

Level two, and I'm back to the fleet again. Same goal as ever, shoot down lots of TIEs before the timer runs out. It's not the deepest game.

And I run out of time again. Well, I'm done with this game.

Okay fine, I played it one more time to see what was after the fleet. It was more asteroids, yay.


Next game!