Die Hard (TurboGrafx-16)

That's a good title screen I reckon. Nice colours, it's got the right logo, and they even put the Nakatomi Plaza building on it. Which is nice seeing as the entire movie takes place there.

This isn't exactly how the film opens, but it's an event that takes place near the start so that's close enough.

Hey, that actually kind of looks like Alan Rickman.

And that is recognisably Bruce Willis. It's already the most authentic Die Hard game I've played yet.

You've got to be shitting me? Die Hard starts with a FOREST LEVEL?

I can't read Japanese, but I guess he's saying something like "Did I get into the wrong limo at the airport? This isn't the Nakatomi Plaza. This isn't even in the city".

I don't know who this guy is, but he had a gun so I hit him. For some reason McClane hasn't brought his pistol, so I'm stuck using his fists.

Whoa, this place is falling apart behind me. That could be what the timer is about. It's telling me long I've got until the whole forest collapses into a bottomless pit.

Fortunately that enemy dropped his rifle, so now I'm armed and making some progress. McClane is fast enough to weave between enemy gunfire easily, so getting into position to take a shot at them is no trouble. And one shot is all it takes.

Awesome. Though it seems poor McClane's lost an eye. That must be why he was hiding his face in the intro.

And now we go to the skyscraper and rescue the hostages right?

What the fuck? Does Nakatomi Plaza have a moat now?

We're in a swamp now? Whatever, it doesn't matter. If they want to start their Die Hard game with McClane wading through a swamp and shooting people dressed as cops, then that's their business.

Actually to be honest ANY DEVIATION FROM THE ORIGINAL SOURCE MATERIAL cuts into my soul and makes me want to shake my fists at the screen in tears of frustration and despair. But they gave me a grenade launcher so I'm going to let them off.

The grenade launcher doesn't have much ammo, so I ducked inside a door to see if I could grab another gun.
And now I'm standing in a small room, totally unarmed, with 4 guns... 3 guns pointed directly at my head.

I think I have a plan though.

My plan was elegant in its simplicity, yet devastating in execution.

I was kind of hoping one of them would drop a rifle. Still, the enemy on the right dropped a health... beer? So it wasn't a total disaster.

And now what? We're in the lava caves underneath the building?

Hey this actually looks like it may be the main building. Or at least the basement.

The path branched so I decide to try this door first, then if it turns out to be a dead end I'll backtrack and go the other way.

Another choice of doors? At least it wasn't a dead end.

I can't seem to kill these guys from the ground so I'll just keep moving. McClane's wearing blue because I found some body armour, but they totally should have used his vest colour to show how many hit points he has left.

I have no idea why I'm jumping chasms in a basement, but I'll just go with it for now.

These people really need to work on their aim. And now I've got a choice of doors again.

Huh, another branching corridor? Or is the same one I was at before? Am I going around in circles?

Okay I've definitely been here before. Crap, does that mean I just spent the last 5 minutes going the wrong way?

Uh, okay I'll try this path this time. Or maybe this is the way I went last time. Damn, I can't even remember.

Crap, I'm getting careless now. Now I know I'm in a maze, all my interest in this game is quickly draining away.

Oops, I fell into a hole. Instant kill.

I thought I was in the basement already, where's he falling to? The center of the Earth?

Poor McClane looks like he's getting an explosion in the face there.

Well I've got lots of continues left, but I don't really want to continue to be honest. I was liking the game just fine at the start, the gameplay is actually pretty solid. But I've got no interest in trying to find my way out of a maze.


It's a shame though, because I was so close to making it into the actual building. Probably.