Airwolf (NES)

I've never seen the tv series so I've got no idea what to expect from this. Except a helicopter obviously.

Holy shit what is THAT?

Why are you showing this to me game? I don't get it.

I guess this guy is a character from the series.

Okay, I'll rescue your prisoners, but first I need to know where they're being held, what I'm up against. Give me the situation.

Uh, okay that's a start. I guess X marks the spot. What else do you have?

That's seriously all the intel I've got to work from? Can't you at least tell me what country I'm looking at?

Whatever. I'm getting in my helicopter and I'm flying off to go look for an X.

Oh crap, jets everywhere! Flying around me, firing off missiles.

I had a map on that screen but it keeps flashing off to tell me interesting information about airfields. Why should I care about an airfield anyway?

Oh crap, the airfield is full of aircraft! Well, that makes more sense now.

No shit. My first clue was when I was constantly attacked by enemy aircraft from the second I started playing.

Okay I have apparently reached my X. All I need to do his get this thing down without exploding, grab the passenger, and get out of here.

Okay, there's still a fuel barrel icon left on the map, but I don't feel any need to check that out. I guess I'll just fly off the map boundary and see what happens.

AGH! It would be really cool if I never had to look at that picture again.

MISSION COMPLETE! My reward, another map.

What, do people just push these maps under your door or something?

"What's this, another map with an X on it? Someone must be in danger, I'll phone Hawke!"

Whatever. I don't care as long as I get paid. Hawke does get paid for this right? I don't know how it worked in the series. There must be money involved at some point because this helicopter definitely doesn't run on good intentions alone. Not with those jet engines.

Back to shooting down missiles then.

I wonder what the fuel icon means anyway. An enemy fuel dump to blow up for bonus points?

Nope. Just a pink truck.

Wait, what are you doing? Stop that! Get off my helicopter.

I don't need refuelling, I have only just started the level!

And then the instant I get off the ground I get blown out of the sky. Is that supposed to be a flying wolf in sheep's clothing or something?

Oh just leave me alone this is really getting old now.

Another brilliant rescue, yay.

'Hell done'? Oh wait, that's a 'w'. Uh, thanks sir!

The next level has ghost planes and takes place over a lake of blood. Possibly.

Well, looking on the bright side, at least I don't have to play it anymore.