Blinx: The Time Sweeper (Xbox)

Developer:

Artoon

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Release Date:

2002

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Systems:

Xbox

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This week on Super Adventures, I'm playing a game about a cat called Blinx: The Time Sweeper. I gave guest poster mecha-neko plenty of chances to be the one to write this, I know he's a cat person, but he decided to pass so now I'm stuck with it. But there is a good reason why this has to be this particular game on this particular day.

It's because today is the Xbox's 20th birthday and I'm covering an original Xbox exclusive to celebrate! I needed to select a game that was never released on PC but could be played on an Xbox One to make it easier for me to get good screenshots, and once I narrowed my list down to games I could get hold of easily there was only one name left on it. But I think this was probably the best possible choice; I mean it's even got "Only on Xbox" written on the title screen, how perfect is that?

Oh plus it had to be on a 'top ten' list somewhere, that was also important seeing as that's Super Adventures' gimmick this year. Fortunately I found the game on videogamer.com's Top 10 Most Disappointing Console Exclusives. I suppose poor Blinx is probably on a 'Top 10 Failed Mascot Characters' list somewhere as well, seeing as Microsoft straight up abandoned the trademark in 2015. That's not entirely fair though, as he's actually doing pretty well these days as the mascot for the Poorly Aged Things twitter account.

The game's by Japanese developer Artoon, which had a pretty mixed output, with lots of red and yellow scores on their Metacritic page. Though they did also create Blue Dragon and The Last Story with Mistwalker. Unfortunately that really was their last story, as they went defunct in 2010. It was directed by Naoto Ohshima, the legendary character designer who came up with Sonic the Hedgehog. He also directed Sonic CD and Nights into Dreams... and his latest project was designing characters for Balan Wonderworld. So Blinx is actually part of a pretty, uh, remarkable lineage.

Anyway I'm going to give it an hour or so and see what it's like.

Dungeon Siege (PC)

Developer:

Gas Powered Games

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Release Date:

2002

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Systems:

Windows, Mac

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This week on Super Adventures I went and did that thing I wasn't supposed to do and played another RPG! I've got nothing against the genre, they just take so much time and so many words.

Dungeon Siege has gotten a bit of a reputation for being a game that basically plays itself, but I've got fond memories of it. Well, I've got a vague memory of being fond of it at least. I've beaten the game, but the only thing I can recall after 14 years is that the steampunk goblins were cool. So I plan to keep going in the game at least long enough to run into those guys.

You know I still get surprised when I'm reminded this got an movie adaptation, though I can very much believe it was nega-director Uwe Boll who made it happen. 'In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale' came out five years after the game, in actual cinemas, with folks like Jason Statham, Ron Perlman, Ray Liotta and Burt Reynolds collecting paychecks for their participation. Boll really was on a mission to ruin the chances of us ever getting a decent video game movie back then, releasing three of them in 2007 alone ('Dungeon Siege', 'Postal' and 'BloodRayne 2'). He's slowed down a bit since then, but that hasn't saved us from 'In the Name of the King 3: The Last Mission'.

(Click any image to see the original sized screenshot. The game can apparently support more modern resolutions, but I’ll be playing at 800x600 because I want to give you a fighting chance to read the on screen text.)

Divine Divinity (PC)

Developer:

Larian

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Release Date:

2002

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Systems:

Windows

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This week on Super Adventures I've decided to look at another RPG, even though they take forever to play and write up. Because I am an idiot.

First though I have to talk about the name, because the title of Divine Divinity is famous for its redundancy. But is it a contender for the worst RPG title ever? It doesn't have 'chronicles', 'origins', 'prophecy', 'legacy', 'book' or 'Eragon' in there, so I'm thinking... no. It's distinctive and memorable so it gets the job done, even if it is dumb. The game was originally going to be called Divinity: The Sword of Lies, but their publisher was apparently fond of alliteration after doing well with Sudden Strike and I guess Divinity: Deceitful Dagger didn't do it for them.

Riftrunner on the other hand would've been a terrible title for a sequel in my opinion, and Larian were wise to eventually change it to Beyond Divinity. Now they just need to change it so that the damn game works on my PC so I can play that too.

Speaking of the developers making things that work, I'm liking this theme music: Divine Divinity theme (YouTube link). It's more melancholy than your typical heroic RPG music, with harpsichord in place of chanting Vikings.

(Click screenshots to inflate them to their original dimensions.)

Star Wars: Jedi Knight II - Jedi Outcast (PC)

Developer:

Raven

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Release Date:

2002

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Systems:

Windows, Mac, Xbox, GameCube (but not PS2)

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Today on Super Adventures I'm taking a look at Star Wars: Jedi Knight II: Jedi Outcast, the third in the Jedi Knight series. Poor Dark Forces: it was the one that started the games off in the first place but Jedi Knight was the name that stuck. Because it has 'Jedi' in it and every Star Wars fan wants to be a telekinetic space samurai.

I've played this before, but it's been so long now that all I remember about it is that the lightsaber combat is a step up from the last game and it probably does the shooting better. I mean you'd expect it have decent gunplay considering LucasArts passed the series on to FPS veterans Raven Software for this one, who were coming off Soldier of Fortune and Star Trek: Voyager - Elite Force at the time. It seemed like Raven were getting around to all the big space sci-fi franchises in turn and giving them each a shooter, but instead they switched to making Marvel action RPGs weirdly, and now they make Call of Duty DLC.

The game has a 'mods' option right in the menu, which is cool, but I won't be touching any of them. I want the pure, unedited, non-Special Edition Jedi Outcast experience. Well, the single player experience anyway, I won't be showing multiplayer, and I won't be turning it off until I get to a proper Jedi duel.

Warning: This may contain spoilers for the earlier Jedi Knight games, including the fact that the hero becomes a Jedi Knight.

(Click images to expand them into bigger images.)

V.I.P. (GBA)

Huh... my keen video gamer instincts are telling me that this game is based on something, isn't it?

Today on Super Adventures I'm learning that 'V.I.P.' was a TV series starring Pamela Anderson that somehow ran for four years a decade or so ago without me ever learning of its existence. This isn't even the only licensed V.I.P video game, as there's at least three of the things available on systems like the PlayStation 2, Game Boy Colour, and Game Boy Advance, and I can't imagine that this is in any way a good thing for the humans who have to share the planet with them. That's not a knock on V.I.P. by the way, I've never seen the series, I just know that games based on any TV series (even the good ones) aren't typically regarded as things that have any business existing. Though I will of course give this one a fair chance to win me over.

Neverwinter Nights (PC) - Part 2

Today on Super Adventures, I'm still playing Neverwinter Nights from 2002.

Click to jump back to part one.

Neverwinter Nights (PC) - Part 1

Today on Super Adventures I'm taking a quick look at classic Forgotten Realms D&D RPG Neverwinter Nights! No not the revolutionary 1991 game by Stormfront Studios that dared to find out what would happen if you took an MMORPG and added graphics, I mean the other one by BioWare that came out around a decade later in 2002. I couldn't blame you for getting the two confused though, as they're both D&D games with a strong multiplayer component that share the same bloody name, setting and city!

The dumb thing is that all that BioWare needed to do was think of another word to go with 'Neverwinter' and it would've been fine! Or they could've just called the thing Neverwinter on its own like the folks who made the 2013 MMO would later do. Legacy of Neverwinter Chronicles: Origins, there you go!

Great looking font though.

I said earlier that I'd be taking a quick look at the game, but it's an RPG so that was actually code for 'I'll be playing this for hours'. I've written about enough of these games by now to know the drill: to get a good feel for what kind of RPG this is I'm going to have to invest a fair bit of time, so forgive me if this drags on a bit.

(Clicking gameplay images will likely open them up a little bigger, with more readable text and obvious aliasing.)

Mafia (PC)

Today's 'M' game is 30s gangster simulator Mafia, though weirdly every other site on the internet seems to be part of a conspiracy to convince the world that it's called Mafia: The City of Lost Heaven. I don't know why they're all so keen to disseminate such obvious MISINFORMATION (probably because it makes it easier to actually find the game in a search engine), but if you check any of the game boxes, the official website, or the game itself, all you'll see is 'Mafia'.

I've played this one before, but I don't remember getting very far in it. In fact it's been so long that I don't even remember what happened to my game box, so I had to get a second copy of it just to play it for you folks. Good ol' 2002: late enough for the average game to be a gig or two big, but just too early for DVDs to be standard for PC. Three CDs this comes on, all stacked up on the same spindle to maximise the chances that at least one of them's getting scratched.

Anyway, like always I plan to play this just long enough to get a handle on what kind of game it's trying to be and judge if it's any good at it, then once I'm satisfied I'll kick the door open and bail.

(Click the screenshots to view them in an utterly mindblowing 1280x960 resolution).

Kingdom Hearts (PS2)

Today's 'K' game is... Kingdom Hearts, obviously. It's not exactly an obscure series, but it's pretty much slipped right by me so I'm coming into this one almost entirely clueless. I have absolutely zero nostalgia for the game.

I do know that it's an epic collaboration between Square and Disney, bringing characters from both their franchises together in an attempt to come up with a third person action game with enough star power to rival Super Mario 64. This would've been back when Square still had that feud with Nintendo going on, so Super Mario RPG 2 was way off the table.

Okay I admit that a few years back I did give Kingdom Hearts half an hour or so to win me over, but I didn't exactly come away from it with a deeper understand of what I'd been playing. All I remember of it now is running around a desert island looking for fish to eat. Forever.

Hang on, is that a dead fish sticking out of the protagonist's mouth right now? I just assumed that it must be a bit of plant, but now that I'm looking at it properly...

Jazz Jackrabbit (GBA)

Today I'm taking a look at Jazz Jackrabbit, for the Game Boy Advance. Despite the name it's actually not a port of the original PC game, though you'd be forgiven for thinking otherwise as that's a perfectly normal reaction to seeing two different games with the same bloody title.

Yeah it turns out that they made three of these games in the end, but I didn't learn about this third one until recently, so it's apparently not all that memorable. For a while the world was getting a new Jazz Jackrabbit game every four years, but this managed to derail that tradition and sent the series crashing right into a metaphorical wall.

I've never played this before and I haven't checked the reviews so I don't know yet whether it was a tragic end or a mercy killing, but I'm trying to stay optimistic. Well reasonably optimistic anyway, I don't expect it'll be as good as Jazz 2.

Incoming Forces (PC)

Today's game is Incoming Forces, the sequel to Incoming by Rage Software, the people who brought the world Hostile Waters and a whole lot of football games before finally evaporating into mist in January 2003. Apparently Go! Go! Beckham! Adventure on Soccer Island wasn't the cash cow they'd hoped for.

I played Incoming for the first time a few days ago, so it seemed like a good idea to play this one as well while the earlier game's still fresh in my mind. Unfortunately though Incoming doesn't seem to be the kind of game that stays in the mind, but I'll try my best to compare them anyway.

(Click the pictures to expand them to a slightly less retro resolution.)

Arx Fatalis (PC)

I'm still going through titles beginning with A and today I've dug up another game from my epic pile of requests for you: classic PC/Xbox RPG Arx Fatalis.

I know next to nothing about this other than that it came out in 2002 (a couple months after Morrowind) and that it's the first game from Arkane Studios, the creators of Dark Messiah of Might and Magic and Dishonored, but hey that's enough to catch my interest. Well okay to be fair I haven't seen much of those two games either, though they seem like they could be cool, so maybe this will... seem cool too.

Arkane actually had another big project secretly in the works during the mid 00's, called Half-Life 2: Episode 4, but that didn't work out in the end; partially because Valve forgot to release Episode 3. Over six years we've been waiting for the resolution to that cliffhanger now in case you're wondering.

(Click the images to view their giant-sized doppelgängers.)

Medal of Honor: Allied Assault (PC)

Fans of murky faded screenshots rejoice, as today I'm taking a quick look at a classic World War 2 first person shooter (again).

Medal of Honor: Allied Assault is the third game in the franchise after PlayStation exclusives Medal of Honor and Medal of Honor: Underground. Weirdly though, this never got a console release; instead the Xbox, PS2 and Game Cube got their own game a few months later called Medal of Honor: Frontline which was never released on PC. Maybe they just wanted to make sure each system got a game tailored to the machine's strengths, or maybe it was a deliberate scheme to confuse and annoy me, I don't know.

But what I do know is that 22 of Allied Assault's developers (including the lead designers) went on to form a new company called Infinity Ward after this and spent the next seven years building up a rival WW2 FPS franchise of their own that went on to achieve a certain measure of success. So I suppose you could say that this is Call of Duty 0.

(Click the pics to view in x-treme 1280x1024 resolution. I'm sorry folks, I've got a retro monitor so all I can get are retro screenshots.)

Final Fantasy X (PS2)

Today I thought I'd take a quick look at Final Fantasy X on the PlayStation 2 and see what that's all about. Depending on who you talk to it seems to either be the best in the series since FFVII or a complete mess, so I'm curious about which side I'm going to end up on.

Final Fantasy X began development back in 1999, which was a crazy time for the franchise seeing as Square was also simultaneously working on Final Fantasy IX and Final Fantasy XI as well as the epic (financial) disaster that was the Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within movie. It's real shame that film wasn't put into development just a couple of years later, after the Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter movies brought the fantasy genre into fashion, as we might have actually gotten a proper Final Fantasy movie out of Square Pictures before it vanished. With Chocobos and Black Mages and everything!

Instead the closest we've got is Advent Children and that's just sad.

Final Fantasy V (PSX)

Today I'm taking a quick look at Final Fantasy V, the last of the numbered FF games to not get a Western release, at least not for a long while. But FF2 and FF3 were skipped over at the time because the NES had become obsolete before they could make it across the ocean. FF5 on the other hand could have made it into US shops mid 1993, around the peak of the system's popularity, so why didn't it? Apparently the reason was that it's "just not accessible enough to the average gamer", which has me a little worried, because I'm an average gamer! I don't want to get hopelessly confused by a SNES RPG, that'd just be embarrassing.

Incidentally, Square's refusal to give the world a English release made this one of the first games ever to get a full fan translation. Fortunately I don't need it though as Square eventually did give English speakers their own version of the game a decade later on the PlayStation.

Spider-Man (GBA)

At last, the game that no doubt everyone's been waiting for: the GBA version of Spider-Man (The Movie)! Though this title screen music definitely ain't the Spider-Man: The Movie theme. Sounds like it'd be more at home in Spider-Man: The Old Amiga Game.

This is another case of a handheld game released alongside a console game with the same title, same cover art, same everything... except for the actual game inside the box. I get why they do it, they want to sell two games with a single marketing campaign (plus in this case it's a movie tie-in as well), I just wish they'd give each version a subtitle or something so it's clear that they're different products.

Zone of the Enders: The Fist of Mars (GBA)

Here's another requested game for y'all: Zone of the Enders: The Fist of Mars, for the Game Boy Advance. A relentlessly, fervently and strenuously requested game in fact. Hopefully now I've finally gotten around to playing it I'll be able earn myself some peace.

I honestly don't know much about the Z.O.E. franchise, except that it's about giant robots shooting at each other, though I have a feeling that they tend to be 3D third person shooters. But that isn't usually the GBA's style so I don't know what to expect from this. Judging by the music I'm guessing... Ridge Racer style racing game.

Star Trek: Bridge Commander (PC)

Today I'm playing Bridge Commander, a Star Trek space sim by Totally Games, the makers of the legendary X-Wing and TIE Fighter series, unarguably the best space dogfighting games EVER MADE. Well okay maybe that's debatable, but it's undeniable that people seem to like them and if this turns out to be even 50% as good then it'll be 1000% better than 99% of the Trek games I've played so far.

I like how it boldly proclaims 'YOU are the Captain. You have the Conn.' on the cover and has an empty captain-shaped hole to show that yes it's actually YOU commanding this ship! Plus you've suddenly become a bald man with a strong resemblance to Patrick Stewart and the crew are concerned that if you lean any further you'll fall off your chair.

Go! Go! Beckham! Adventure on Soccer Island (GBA)

Today I'm taking a look at Go! Go! Beckham! Adventure on Yoshi's Island on the Game Boy Advance, a fictionalised account of the adventures of English soccer star David Beckham.

I'm just hoping it's not going to be a cartoony football sports game, because that'll lead to some boring screenshots for sure. Unless you're one of those people who loves seeing identical shots of little men standing around on a green rectangle.

No One Lives Forever 2: A Spy in H.A.R.M.'s Way (PC)

At last I've finally gotten around to No One Lives Forever 2, the second game in Sierra's secret agent spoof stealth shooter series set in the sixties starring sexy Scottish super-spy Cate Archer (still no relation to Sterling Archer).

The first game's title was obviously inspired by the Bond movies, but sadly Monolith decided not to give the sequel its own name and just stapled '2' onto the end. Imagine if the Bond series had gone the same way, we'd be up to Dr. No 23 by now. It's a shame because A Spy In H.A.R.M.'s Way would have actually worked fine as a stand alone title. Though I suppose it makes sense that without a recognisable '007'-style logo or a famous character, the title's the only brand they had to sell it with.

(Click the pictures to view them in their original resolution.)