The 7th Saga (SNES)

This title screen isn't filling me with optimism to be honest.

That's some pretty nice art though.

According to the text, this is 'one of those stories that will be talked about for generations to come'.

Is there a reason why that's treated like a big reveal?

'Many years ago, people fought fierce battles to win this land, these heroic battles inspired many legends... the planet is called .... TICONDERA!!!! .....'

Those aren't great graphics, but the characters look pretty good. Shame they walk around like stuttering robots.

Apparently the person in blue at the top of the screen is recruiting heroes one by one for something. They walk on screen, the name of the character appears, people walk off, cut to the next screen... repeat 6 more times.

Hmm... I'll go with the Alien for my first character because he seems to have pretty strong physical stats. Then I'll start rounding out my team with some magic users.

Oh, I only get one character? Oh, well... okay then.

Wait, leader of the world? That's awesome, I'll take that. So what was that about power, I missed it. What do I need to do to get this power and become leader of the world?

Awesome, free stuff! I guess we go rune hunting then.

Anyone here want to team up? I could use a healer, a wizard... anyone? Fine I guess I'm playing alone then.

I can't figure out how to get this crystal ball to come up, but after a little exploration I did find a mherb 1 in an unlocked box. Hey I just selected 'Search' from the menu, it was the character who decided to take it! I don't even know what a mherb 1 is or why I'd want one.

I don't really like the pop up menu this game uses, I'd prefer a simple 'press button to activate' system. If I'm looking at a box, and I press the action key, is it really that likely that I intend to 'Talk', use 'Magic', use an 'Item', or view my 'Status'?

I finally get outside the castle, only to find that everyone else has already crept out of town without me while I was busy stealing herbs. I'm way behind now, I haven't even bought any gear yet.

I can't equip anything? No weapons, no armour? I have to go out into battle wearing nothing but this towel?

Well, looking on the positive side, at least I'll save money.

The crystal ball makes an appearance! It seems that instead of having me run into invisible encounters at random, the game has them swarm me instead.

I can't see a town on the map, but the guy said it was south so I'll head down. I might as well, it's the only direction I can actually go.

I don't know what the hell that is, but I think he's looking for a fight.

Some guy I chatted to on the way out of town mentioned I should defend first, then attack. So I'll see how that works out for me.

Well I beat the first guy... then I took two more steps on the world map and his friends arrived and beat the crap out of me so fast I barely had two turns to fail to escape in.

Fortunately I'd checked in at the inn before I left, so I reappeared back here with full health and my wallet considerably lighter. The game recommends I invest my money in jewels because the enemy doesn't like to steal shiny things from my wounded unconscious body. They're only after hard cash.

I guess now I know why enemies always seem to drop cash in rpgs when I kill them at least.

It'd be nice right now if I had a menu option to tell this guy to get out of my damn way. He's totally blocking the path. I guess I'll just wait for him to move then.

Well this town turned out to be more or less useless except for the inn. Though I admit I got bored talking to npcs and trying to buy items that I can't equip, so it's possible I missed something important.


LATER.

This looks important though. Some kind of palace, temple or castle?

The crystal ball is back, and it's covered in enemy dots, so I guess this is a dungeon.

But I have no map, and the hallways fill up most of the screen, so finding my way around is a pain in the ass.

Well, I'm screwed. Okay, I guess I'm not ready for this dungeon quite yet. I'm sure I saw another location on the crystal ball to visit though...


ONE JOURNEY ACROSS THE OVERWORLD LATER.

I've got no reason to think I'll have any more luck here, but I'll give it a shot. Worst case scenario, I wander around for a bit, get a level up, and get my ass kicked all the way back to the last inn.

Well actually the worst case scenario would be that I immediately got killed by the first enemy I found and got absolutely nothing for coming here.

Which is what just happened.


LATER.

Okay my new plan is beautiful in its simplicity. I'm going to wander the world map and keep fighting enemies until I'm massively overpowered.

And then I'm going to go back to that first dungeon and steal everything that isn't nailed down.


A FEW LEVELS LATER.

Son of a BITCH! I really hope this means that I can only carry 9 potions, and not that I've already maxed out my total carrying capacity with the pitiful collection of gear I currently have in my bag.

Not that I'm happy about only having 9 potions.


LATER.

Finally, after wandering around this damn dungeon for seemingly hours (probably more like a few minutes), I have encountered... a growling whirlwind on a throne?

Well damn. He's got more spikes than I do.

This bastard really did some damage to me, and worse he kept stealing my health to heal himself! That ain't right. But eventually I managed to chip his health down bit by bit and soon it seemed like I might actually win this.

And then I ran out of potions.


Next game.